I was just browsing through my blogs, and in rereading this one, I realized that I'd kept some important information out this entry. At the time, I was just weary of admitting that..... well... I was on mushrooms when I wrote this. I guess I should also say that I don't feel there's anything wrong with taking psychedelics once in a great while. (and I mean a great while. It's really only once every couple years for me, and only when I feel it's "time".) It's about learning, and gaining clarity - not about getting high. -- Bianca - Jan. 2011
-- I should note that when I say "her" I'm referring to my Mother. She was very sick at the time, and did a sort of astral healing process on her. I cut most of that part out though, as it's kind of personal. I then go into something else, unrelated to the healing.
...I tuned into the video of Eckhart Tolle again, which was playing in the background. (Who's calming voice initially sent me into this alternate state. Once I went in, I could no longer hear.) I let his voice take hold of the moment as I came to listening once again, but then saw an enormous connecting bridge which was a sort breathing spirit which connected my soul to hers and then I took that image and sent it up to the heavens and into the sun. The sun was then giving and receiving new energies which were bold and undeniably positive and that of raw creation. Then, something broke my attention I started talking to Edward about something. Then, he put on Santana's Caravanserai... Awesome album.
I layed back down again in my spot on the couch, and put my covers back over my earthen body, and the eye bag pillow to weigh my eyes lids down. When I revisited the realm it was nothing but open-space. It was the simple nothingness of outer space. I saw our galaxy and then, the giant vacuum of nothingness which lay at the center.
I peered down into the black hole, and saw that this nothingness was everythingness. I then saw that it's nothingness created everything at it's outer perimeters. I realized that time is what progressed creation, and realized that time is actually the moving of the outer perimeters into the center. That once these material objects; solar systems and their stars, and life bearing worlds were only things which awaited their inevitable turn into the giant mass which gave it's form from beginning.
I questioned the black hole. Is it really pulling in? Or is it spewing out as well? Is this energy both sucking and pushing? Yes! It's the push that births form, but it's also the pull which gives it time with which to dwell in...
(At the time it seemed to make sense, but scientifically it's incorrect. I wouldn't say there is a physical push. I was more refering to an auric feild, or spiritual breath of life as a push)
And that was the vision. And here I am again. The black hole was a magical force. It's no wonder we silly humans try to build enormous tunnels deep into our earth to clash atoms so that we might understand what the nothingness really is. Sadly, we'll only learn it once it's ready to reveal it's self. I don't believe we are overstepping ourselves or acting outside of the laws of nature in trying to understand it, because we are nature. This investigation is simply consciousness understanding it's self. Well that's meta 101, obviously. But it could never be underestimated or repeated too many times. Consciousness needs to acquaint it's self with it's self. It needs to happen over and over so that it can exist indefinitely. Just the way an atom will only act predictably while it's being observed - taking that on to a larger scale, the entire universe needs to observe it's self in order for it to follow any kind of cosmic design pattern. This is probably a process which happens within infinity, and our juvenile attempts with our particle colliders are just the tools we have at this moment, and in another moment humanity has already made contact. Perhaps in that other-realm we realized smashing atoms wasn't the answer at all.
...I tuned into the video of Eckhart Tolle again, which was playing in the background. (Who's calming voice initially sent me into this alternate state. Once I went in, I could no longer hear.) I let his voice take hold of the moment as I came to listening once again, but then saw an enormous connecting bridge which was a sort breathing spirit which connected my soul to hers and then I took that image and sent it up to the heavens and into the sun. The sun was then giving and receiving new energies which were bold and undeniably positive and that of raw creation. Then, something broke my attention I started talking to Edward about something. Then, he put on Santana's Caravanserai... Awesome album.
I layed back down again in my spot on the couch, and put my covers back over my earthen body, and the eye bag pillow to weigh my eyes lids down. When I revisited the realm it was nothing but open-space. It was the simple nothingness of outer space. I saw our galaxy and then, the giant vacuum of nothingness which lay at the center.
I peered down into the black hole, and saw that this nothingness was everythingness. I then saw that it's nothingness created everything at it's outer perimeters. I realized that time is what progressed creation, and realized that time is actually the moving of the outer perimeters into the center. That once these material objects; solar systems and their stars, and life bearing worlds were only things which awaited their inevitable turn into the giant mass which gave it's form from beginning.
I questioned the black hole. Is it really pulling in? Or is it spewing out as well? Is this energy both sucking and pushing? Yes! It's the push that births form, but it's also the pull which gives it time with which to dwell in...
(At the time it seemed to make sense, but scientifically it's incorrect. I wouldn't say there is a physical push. I was more refering to an auric feild, or spiritual breath of life as a push)
And that was the vision. And here I am again. The black hole was a magical force. It's no wonder we silly humans try to build enormous tunnels deep into our earth to clash atoms so that we might understand what the nothingness really is. Sadly, we'll only learn it once it's ready to reveal it's self. I don't believe we are overstepping ourselves or acting outside of the laws of nature in trying to understand it, because we are nature. This investigation is simply consciousness understanding it's self. Well that's meta 101, obviously. But it could never be underestimated or repeated too many times. Consciousness needs to acquaint it's self with it's self. It needs to happen over and over so that it can exist indefinitely. Just the way an atom will only act predictably while it's being observed - taking that on to a larger scale, the entire universe needs to observe it's self in order for it to follow any kind of cosmic design pattern. This is probably a process which happens within infinity, and our juvenile attempts with our particle colliders are just the tools we have at this moment, and in another moment humanity has already made contact. Perhaps in that other-realm we realized smashing atoms wasn't the answer at all.
The entire motive is far too egotistical and greedy to discover the laws of the universe at this point. I've heard that we are looking to harness dark energy for it's possible usefullness as jet fuel, or to propel... something rather. Our cars, or the earth.. our gas stoves or whatnot, I don't know. But this is the wrong motive to look into discovering the laws of the universe. Now, that is not to discredit the passion and life-long work of the scientists at CERN, or other parts of the globe. I'm sure they've been wondering what the cosmos are made of since they were children. I'm speaking more of what's driven funding by the government. The government has little interest in funding anything unless there's a possible way to make weapons out of it.
So, it's really driven by an empty soulless place within humanity that still needs to be healed. Once we've healed our collective pains and neuroticisms, we might be a mature enough civilization who is truly deserving of the answers of the laws of the universe. Let dark matter reveal it's self once we can handle it. Look at poor Einstein, torn in a conflict between good and evil, and look at what happened to our helpless Mother Earth.
On the brighter side, with Obama's introduction I felt as though the earth it's self was in a celebratory rejoice on Inauguration Day. It was as though the time we are in now, regardless of the wars going on in various parts of the world, and regardless of our economic woes, humanity as a singular entity for the most part, finally felt love....all at once! It was beautiful! On Inauguration day, people were crying with joy, and it was felt on such a deep level... finally, we can all be happy at the same time. Peace, and Happiness, finally. That is, for a moment. And then things moved again, Gaza is still in tears, Africa is still starving, China is still choking, Americans are still confused, the Danish are still oblivious, Hawaiians are still surfing stuck in paradise... but the next day, everyone went back to their everyday lives with an extra hop in their step.
I noticed that next day that people looked each other in the eyes directly. At the counter making a purchase, the clerk truly wanted to know how your day was going. Strangers weren't strangers, but someone who smiled with you. People on the streets shared a common bond, and a knowing that maybe things are going to be okay. Maybe all of it isn't too good to be true. The man in office really is a good man. His smile is a real smile, like that of a good doctor entering the the room with the intent and knowledge that what he has in store is good medicine.
On the brighter side, with Obama's introduction I felt as though the earth it's self was in a celebratory rejoice on Inauguration Day. It was as though the time we are in now, regardless of the wars going on in various parts of the world, and regardless of our economic woes, humanity as a singular entity for the most part, finally felt love....all at once! It was beautiful! On Inauguration day, people were crying with joy, and it was felt on such a deep level... finally, we can all be happy at the same time. Peace, and Happiness, finally. That is, for a moment. And then things moved again, Gaza is still in tears, Africa is still starving, China is still choking, Americans are still confused, the Danish are still oblivious, Hawaiians are still surfing stuck in paradise... but the next day, everyone went back to their everyday lives with an extra hop in their step.
I noticed that next day that people looked each other in the eyes directly. At the counter making a purchase, the clerk truly wanted to know how your day was going. Strangers weren't strangers, but someone who smiled with you. People on the streets shared a common bond, and a knowing that maybe things are going to be okay. Maybe all of it isn't too good to be true. The man in office really is a good man. His smile is a real smile, like that of a good doctor entering the the room with the intent and knowledge that what he has in store is good medicine.
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